Sandwich Divorce feeling the squeeze Respondents ages

Wondering how many others out there have gone thru this also. Notice I didn’t say if anyone else but rather how many.

I was married 31 yrs. going on 32 and unlike the “typical” husband, never forgot an anniversary or birthday. I wasn’t the perfect husband, how many of us are, male or female (wives in that instance). We had gotten a computer about 2 or 3 yrs. prior, my oldest son was taking community college courses and needed it for his studies.

I had been a manager at a cable company prior and we had one at work and i also had had an atari 800 which was a simple computer.

Both of our sons had worked with computers at school so the 3 of us had somewhat of a working knowledge of computers. My ex wife wasn’t really interested at first but she started playing games and would ask one of us how to do this or that.
I saw in my navigating around that you could put a free website on geocities and thought I wonder if I could do that. I decided to give it a try and after much trial and error, losing pages and swearing accomplished it. It was about family, relatives, friends and loved ones no longer with us. I had even put a tribute page to my ex because I didn’t always tell her how I felt and it was easier for me to put it into words.

I was very pleased and surprised that I was able to do it.
My ex and I both had belonged to icq and also yahoo im, she joined that at a much later time. I worked days and nights throwing papers, so usually after supper I would lay down and sleep. I was completely unaware of her activities while asleep.

I had no idea that she had put a personals ad in our hometown newspaper presumably, under the guise of perhaps finding someone she had gone to school with or someone that at least lived in the area to keep her up-to-date of what was happening. She found someone, a married man who had 3 kids who had attended the same high school we both graduated from.

They would chat while I was sleeping and as time went by become more and more friendly. This went on for a little over 2 months and about 2 weeks before christmas she told me she was going to go to Dallas for the weekend shopping with some girlfriends. It wasn’t unusual for her to go shopping with girlfriends in Dallas, what was different was the weekend part. I had no reason not to believe or trust her so I gave it no thought.

At this time, both our sons were working in Colorado, and the Friday night before she was going they came home to celebrate Christmas. The reason being was they had to work Christmas day and this was the only time they could make it.

Needless to say, we were both shocked and surprised. One of the first things she said to them was she was going to Dallas the next day and she was sorry she couldn’t spend more time with them. Again, that kind of surprised me but still I gave it no thought.
The next day she left and they left Sunday morning to go back to Colorado. I later found out that she had boarded a plane and flew to Niagara Falls to be with this man.

That was were he was working at the time.

He trained people at nuclear plants. About 3 months later he was looking for a job and told his wife he was going to the Dallas area for a week. My ex wife was a nurse and it wasn’t unusual for her to have to work late.

Guess what she had to work late every night that week. Again I had no clue.
Her parents 50th anniversary was in June and her brother and sister and her were planning a surprise party for them.

All of this was very convenient huh? Anyway, she went back to Pa.

for the party and the following day they had a family reunion.

This is where things fell apart, for some reason known only to her, she took him. Her cousin was a police officer in the same township as her lover’s son.

Monday morning the word flew around the dept. and one of the officer’s called his wife. He was going away that weekend and she had one of her son’s bring a friend over to get into her Dating computer. They found emails where over the years he had affairs with at least 14 other women. Can you imagine her shock, they had been married for 40 yrs. ! The only thing she knew about this woman (my ex) was that she lived in okla.

She wanted to contact me to tell me but couldn’t get information from her husband.

In November of that yr. , my ex lost her job and they had already been talking about moving in together for several months. It worked perfectly except for the fact that he thought his next job would be in another state and his wife would never find out. Unfortunately, his job was about 40 miles from where he lived and my ex was pressuring him daily. He finally agreed and she left with him since they were so right for each other.

This was the end of 2000 right before Christmas. After she left, his wife decided she was going to call every Blessing in the state of Okla. and north Tx. till she found me.

She did locate me which is how I found out all this information and we are and remain friends to this day.
He never planned on getting divorced which was fine with my ex, can you believe that? I went thru devastation, heartbreak and depression for about 3 yrs.

At a few points I even comtemplated suicide. In case you’re wondering I didn’t go through with that idea. I finally snapped out of all those feelings by meeting some really friendly people in music rooms on the internet. It gave me a purpose and reason to go on one day at a time.
The end result of all this is, the relationship didn’t last a yr.

He walked out on her and is back with his Creativity.

The moral of the story: the grass may be greener on the other side of the street but it still needs to be cut.

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